On a recent Saturday night in Austin, Anya Haas went out hoping to meet someone. She planned to grab a bar seat at a trendy restaurant and scope out her options, but when she arrived, it was packed. While waiting, an elderly man offered to buy Haas dinner; she politely declined and left to grab some sushi before heading to a comedy show. There, she figured, it would be easier to mingle with people her own age. But when the 32-year-old hospitality worker arrived at the club, it was mostly empty. She was also the only person who sat in the front row, and the comics singled her out for being alone. Humiliated, Haas then got a ride home from a single, 75-year-old woman who said she drove for Uber in order to meet people. That’s going to be me, Haas thought while petting the driver’s dog.

Once she got home, Haas recorded a video recapping her mortifying experience. “I’m not someone who posts or cries on the internet,” she says. “So this is a new one for me.” Haas, who has been single for the past seven years, talks through tears about how tired she is of people telling her a dream man will “come along when you least expect it.” “I’m so sick of hearing that,” she says, slamming her hands down on her kitchen island. “There’s such a thing as people who just don’t find their person and don’t get married.”

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